How are you feeling about your relationship as of late? Feeling like there’s nothing wrong, per se, however at the same time things don’t feel right?
Even healthy relationships go through ruts where there are feelings of boredom, negativity, and perhaps even apathy. Our lives are filled with daily routines that we adhere to – and while routines can be comforting, they can also begin to grow old and feel stale. Family mealtime conversation becomes dull; hanging out together feels like an obligation; sex is just going through the motions.
You may be tempted to ignore these feelings because you don’t feel like your relationship is actually bad and why stir things up in an otherwise seemingly good relationship, right? Wrong! Keeping silent and allowing yourself to silently suffer can start to build resentment which can lead to problems down the road. Furthermore, we all need stimulation and if we don’t find it within our current lifestyle, many times we’ll look to find that excitement somewhere else… aka extramarital affairs.
Healthy Relationship Tips
Here are 5 simple ways you can keep your love alive and fresh from a marriage counseling NYC therapist which will help you when you find that your relationship is starting to feel a bit stagnant.
- Identify New Activities To Do Together
Sit down with your partner and brainstorm some new things that you two can do together… instead of ordering dinner in, why not try cooking together? Instead of going out for your morning jog alone, you two can go for a walk in the park or go to the gym together. Try taking up a new activity like dancing, painting or photography lessons. The point is to come up with an activity that you two will both enjoy doing in the company of each other.
- Get Away Together
Plan a getaway, even if it’s just for a night or two, just the two of you, where you can experience new surroundings together. You could each take part in planning a vacation or a hiking trip or a weekend visit to the museums downtown.
- Schedule Date Nights (or Days)
Schedule a certain time each week to have coffee or breakfast together or meet for drinks after work to discuss what has been going on in your lives or to make the plans you need to make for the next week.
- Discuss Your Sex Life
Is your sex life working ok for you? Too much…too little…too routine? What needs to change? Try to spice things up a bit… send a naughty text, make use of props, engage in roleplay… all is fair as long as you both enjoy it together.
- Tell Your Partner Why You Love Him or Her
Remind your partner why you fell in love in the first place. Share the qualities you most appreciate in him or her. Mention specific details to keep it real and believable. Touch base mid-day sometimes, just to say “I love you,” “I’m thinking about you.”
You don’t have to take all five actions at one time, but keep these tips in mind to maintain the healthy, loving relationship you already have, or to work toward that as your goal. The care you show your partner and and the effort you put into maintaining your relationship make will come back to you in buckets.